


Always by your side

by CellyCelly



Category: One Direction
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-04
Updated: 2016-05-04
Packaged: 2018-06-06 10:27:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6750223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CellyCelly/pseuds/CellyCelly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I remember when we used to play together all the time, when his current life was only a dream. Now we aren't those dreaming children, we grew up, he chased his dream and succeded well. I continued working at the bakery during summer, while he would be touring worldwide. I singed inside my room, he in front of a whole audience. My love for him continued a secret, he had lots of girlfriends. There was not a single day I wouldn't think about him, he...probably would have forgotten about me already.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

I was finally ending my last shift at the bakery, I dreamed about this day since holidays have started! I love Marge but working here isn't the same without Harry...he's not here to be silly or to laugh like crazy when I used to fall on his pranks. I miss him a lot...  
"You can go home if you want sweetie" Marge was already cleaning the tables, always with a smile on her face."I'll take care of the rest".  
"No way I'll let you do everything alone! Either way I haven't anything to do right now" I smiled at her and started cleaning the balcony, suddenly I caught myself looking at the photo next to the register: Me and Harry working here before he started his new life...  
As my thoughts were floating in that past, a familiar voice woke me up to reality again. "I miss him too you know..." My only reaction was to smile since I was shoked that she knew I was thinking about him.

...

When I alowed myself to rest a bit I started looking around my room. Everywhere around me where photos of me and Harry together. I almost felt like those psycho fans. I guess that I can consider myself as a fan now, since we almost haven't talked to each other in these last two years. It's like our long-lasting friendship has slowly vanished.  
In the end I'd already accepted it, until the moment night comes and I start overthinking about everything. It has turned into a routine, but it's all that I have left...  
As a way to distract me from my self-destructing thoughts I called Lia through Skype.

"You're still thinking about it? Listen babe, if that's how you feel you really should confront him about your questions. You can't just keep on torturing yourself over his lack of presence! His life changed drasticly over night! It's normal that he never gets time to sit and have a chat with you, don't you think?"  
While she was acting like a psycholpgist I grabbed my teddybear looking at my feet. I knew she was right but still it is hard for me to accept I have lost him."I know you're right I admit it. But there's still a part of me who doesn't want to let go of the hope that everything will return to normal, you know?". "Miranda, I just want the best for you and right now the best is probably for you to stop caring that much about it!"  
"I...okay, I won't care about it anymore..." I jumped as I heard a scream coming out of the laptop. "Finally yoy listen to me!!!" I laughed a bit about how silly she could be.  
"Before I forget, my mother told me to invite you to for dinnee tomorrow, apparently she invited some people, and you better don't leave alone on this!". "Just don't kill me and I'll do whatever you want!" We continued talking as the sun started rising again.

...

First day of school is basically the most repetitive cicle ever created. Talking about what we did during summer and listening to those annoying freshman girls who are 'OMG so obcessed with Harry Styles and One Direction in general'. It really gets on my nervs hearing them talking about Harry like if they knew him so well. Half of wjat they were saying was rubish taken out of those gossip magazines.  
"Hey! Miranda! Are you listening?" Lia pinched my arm to catch my attention while looking for our friends. "Uhm...sorry I was slightly distracted".  
I noticed she understood what was disturbing me and she smiled at me in a comforting way."Just ignore those girls, you know him better than that. What I was saying was that we should just go to the mall, after all we aren't doing anything here" It was just as if she had read my mind."I was going to suggest exactly that you know"  
She grabbed my arm and pulled me out of there like a race car. "Then what are we waiting for?! Let's go!"  
Before we had gotten to the car a black t-shirt got on my way. I looked a bit up and there he was. Jon. As if I jadn't enough things to worry about.  
"Where are you going girls?"he looked at me with his typical smile.  
"It's none of your business playboy" I answered rough continuing to walk but in a glimpse of an eye he had hold me by my waist and pushed me against his car.  
"Come on Miranda, why so cold suddenly? I thought you liked me"  
"You're kidding right?" I couldn't believe he was coming up with this, but he looked at me in a way I understood he was talking seriously."Listen, we just made out and I was already drunk okay? Just ignore it, after all you're doing that all the time"  
I got in the car as quick as it was possible and just got the lowest I could on the seat trying to pretend that moment didn't happen. "I can't believe he really thought you were into him!" Lia was laughing her butt out of the situation while driving us to the mall. "Don't laugh about it I never felt so embarassed in my life! Why the bloody hell would he think I fancied him? I was freacking drunk!"  
After a bit I started playing around with the radio stations trying to find one I'd like, after changing a hundred times finally a song I liked was playing. I started singing along to How Deep is your Love, like there was no tomorrow.  
"In a way Harry was right...You really should've got to the auditions with him that time..." I freezed, I would never have the guts to sing in front of a whole audience. "You know me Lia, I'm too shy for that! I was made to sing in the bath tub that's all."  
"I really don't understand you..."she starts shaking her head."Now I understand why he got so angry at you"  
"Can we please not talk about this." The last I needed was starting to remember about that day, even now I think it's because of that that he got so distant...I felt like I was about to cry so I forced myself to think about something else.

...

"I quit! I can't see more clothes in front of me! I don't know what to wear!" I throwed my body on the bed desperatly. "Just calm down! I got this!" Lia chose some light pink ripped shorts with a black crop top and my black converse."You should be okay with this, after all it's not going to be formal so why do you have to be so stressed?".  
"BECAUSE my mom told there would be special guests so I only have to be stressed!" she started laughing right on my face. "Oh my sweet summer child, you know nothing".  
"Don't you dare come up with Game of thrones quotes on me at this critical time of my life Lia Buchhaim!" Whn she noticed she had already been atacked with my pillow.  
My phone ringed and I saw I had a notification from CosmoMag online and since it was about Harry I decided to read while Lia continued bragging about me being childish.  
"Now stop acting like a child and go get dressed" I didn't reacted to what she said because I felt like my world had been shattered into little pieces right in front of my face."Hey what's that face?"


	2. The dinner

Paralyzed I gave her the phone so she could understand my reaction.

**"Harry Styles coments in an interview that "theres only one girl in Cheshire whose name I won't reveal that has always had a special place in my heart" who could be the mistery girl? Is this a way of Harry telling us that there's a new romance floating in the air? We still don't know yet but certainly Harry will soon reveal this whole secret!"**

  
"I can't believe this!"she looked at me with the same reaction as I "Neither do I. He has never mentioned me in any kind of interview so why now?"  
"Maybe he was never given the chance to mention you?"

Still speechless with what I had just read I went to the bathroom to get changed. I looked in the mirror asking myself if all this had a reason or if it was just a way Harry could bring more attention towards him.  
Lia had obviously chosen just the right outfit, I felt happy about how my figure was. We did each others makeup and since we had lots of time left we decided to go help my mother in the Kitchen.

...

"I think you'll be really happy about our guests Miranda" my mother comments while I was preparing the salad and Lia in the other hand washing the dishes.

"And who are those guests?"

  
"I'm not going to tell you now, just wait to see" I really hate when my mother acts all secretive.  
Lia came beside me and whispered "Why won't she tell you?". "I have no idea..."

  
After we had prepared dinner me and Lia started putring the table and almost like it was ment to be after we had finished the doorbell ringed. I went through hallway and opened the door and when I saw who it was I stood estatic without moving a muscle just looking who was towards me. It couldn't be really him in front me...could he?...

  
"Hey Mira" I got the goosebumps as I heard that voice pronouncing that old nickname only he used to call me and seeing that smile I had missed so much.

  
It was really him. Harry was really standing in front of me. But why was I still there just looking at him?

  
"H-harry... You're... Here? But how?" I felt my voice shaking as I tried to talk with him.

"The lads and I are going to record the album here, so I couldn't help but come visit you as soon as I'd arrive" He hugged me tight, a hug I wish would last forever but I knew it wouldn't. Suddenly I noticed a tear rolling down my face and I tried to wipe it off before he'd notice.

  
After a bit we went inside and of course my mother wouldn't stop making questions to Harry, asking how it was travelling around the world and how the orher band members were. Questions I always thought of asking him but never really gotten the chance to.

  
I ended up getting to the backyard sitting on a chair, just looking at the stars, questioning the same as always...does he still care about me like before? Because I know I do...

  
"Mira? Do you mind if I sit beside you?" I apreciated the few seconds I heard his voice and only made him a bit of space so he would be able to sit. I continued observing the stars trying to understand what has happened these two years. "What are you doing?"

  
I smiled softly remebering."The same we always used to do together. Do you remeber when we spend hours looking at the stars and just talk?"

  
"Those were good times...you know...even if I am living my dream...I miss those calm days..." He lookes at me with what I considered a sad expression, but at this point I was worried I wouldn't recognize his true feelings anymore after all this time.

  
"Since you left...there hasn't been a single day I hadn't been here looking at the stars during hours...asking myself if you were doing the same..."

  
"Miranda..."I ignored and continued talking."...but then I came to the conclusion that you were probably doing some concert or be at some party...I stopped doing this so regularly...I started coming here just once in a while...and still I knew that you weren't even thinking about it..." I hugged him hard and whispered him that I had missed him which only was answered by him tightening the hug and at that moment it was all I needed.

  
"I'm really sorry..."he said with his head down.

  
"The thing Harry, is that you don't need to apologize"I looked at him, his hair continued messy like always, his eyes still had that shimmer. When I noticed better his shirt I noticed it had three buttons and I smiled softly seeing that they were open like always. Those were the little things I used to keep so dearly in my heart. "In the end...you're only living your life forwards. And I stayed behind, it's not your fault that I'm afraid to change my life the way you did. Each one of us chose their path, I already got that clear on my mind and I'm ok with it because that's just the way it is. Our realities are different now."

"Only because you didn't want to come with me! You know perfectly that you had way more chances to win than me! It could have been you winning the show instead of Rebbecah!" he said stubborn as always claiming that I should have gone with him to the auditions.

The way he talked to me, the deep look in his face, all that made me remember our last fight. Deep in my head I blame that fight for making us keep this distance but I know that probably it didn't. It was similair to what he said now, I remember,he wanted me to go with him but I was too scares and ended up hiding away in my room not going.

  
"Well, I'm not like you Harry!! I could never do the audition!! Is it so hard to understand?!"

  
"And because of that you had to keep distance from me?!" our conversation had lead us to another fight, but this time I wouldn't keep quiet.

  
"I was always by your side Harry! But of course there was a time where I couldn't stand seeing so clpse the fact that I was loosing you!!" maybe I was messing up but honestly I don't give a bloody fuck!

  
"Loosing me!? I used to invite you to come to the rehearsals with me! But you were the one always making up excuses not to come!!!" he got up walking around. I could see he was getting pissed off, the problem was that I was too.

  
"Maybe because I was sick and tired of seeing you with that bitch Tiffany, have you ever thought about that?! Have you ever thought that there could be a reason?! For fucks sake Harry! I thought you knew me better!!" I felt myself crashing emotionally while talking about all this. Everytime I thought about meeting Harry again I never thought it would end up like this.

  
"She was a contestant and you knew it! What where you thinking? That she would take your place as my best friend?!" how dumb could he be! He isn't really understanding anything!

  
"She liked you and was constantly flirting with you! It bothered me!" i answered him starting to pull my hair due to all the rage I was feeling.

  
"But why did it bother you so much?! I truly can't understand all that drama!?!"

I was getting so tired of how blind he is! I can't even think straight anymore!

  
"Because I liked you more than a friend! But like always I used to just shut my mouth in order to not ruin our friendship! But look where it got me!!" I was starting to feel exhausted, I didn't want to say these things and still they came out of my mouth...

  
Harry just stared at me, probably not quite believing what I just said. I don't get if he said all he wanted to say or if he just decided to keep it to himself.

  
"Why did you never tell me?" he asked in a more soft way, making his hair slide through his fingers.

  
"I already told you why" i looked at him trying to hold back my tears.

  
"I would never let that happen! Mira, if you had told me that before..." i shut his mouth with a finger, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath.

  
"Nothing would have changed and we wouldn't have got so distant...I know...but what is done is done, there's no going back..." I lowered my hand, looking at the moon's reflection in the pool. "Many things have changed, we're not those kids from middle school anymore, and we haven't been present in eaxh others lifes to see those changes happen. We have to face the truth, Harry. And the truth is we don't know each other like we used to anymore. And there are plenty misunderstoods left in the past."

"And what are you trying to say with that?" his eyes showed that he was a bit worried about all that, but only he knows what it is.

  
"I'm trying to say that we should probably start all over again. Only that way we can forget the past and go on." it's a little bit strange thinking this way, and I am kinda feeling like one of those characters in romances, but it's the only way.

"I just don't want us to act like strangers again. Because really I missed you buttercookie." he opened his arms with a huge smile. I just hugged him hoping everything would be alright. Because this is the only way evrrything makes sense. And for the first time in many years I feel that all is on it's right place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly re wrote this chapter a couple of times because I wasn't very happy with the whole content. I still think it looks a bit cliché but I promise I will put an effort to achieve what I really want with this storyline. I hope you liked it!

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I write in english so if I misspelled something please tell me. I hope it doesn't get to confuse because I've written this first in portuguese but I promise I will try to do better each time. Hope you like it!


End file.
